Just Joking.

During a conversation, I have a hard time judging when a person is serious. When a person says that I’m beautiful, are they serious? or joking? When a person says that I am slow, are they serious? or joking? Admittedly, these conversations take place inside my head, but similar transactions have occurred of late. And, they have my head spinning.

Maybe it’s my Aspie brain, but I question whether a person is joking even when a statement is followed by “haha I was only joking”. My thoughts are always, “you just criticized me, and you say you’re ‘only joking’?!” It makes me wonder whether people say they are joking so as to cover the sting of the truth. You know, so people can say what they want and get away with it.

So, how can I tell? How do I know when a person is really joking and when they are really serious? If a person is, in fact, really joking, how do I remove the sting their words leave behind? My overly thinky brain thinks and thinks and thinks, and at the end of the day, the person’s words are twisted and gnarled. Words that started as a light-hearted joke, now becomes a much darker, more sinister version.

If only people said what they really meant and meant what they said. If only people realized just how powerful their words were. If only people picked their words as carefully as they picked their produce. Words can either hurt or heal … “just joking” never negates what was spoken. Never.


4 thoughts on “Just Joking.”

  1. Getting someone to think before speaking is asking a lot! Some people use “just kidding” when they realise that they have hurt the person’s feelings. Other people use it when they aren’t sure how to express themselves. It is not a particularly useful expression to use.
    It would be nice if people spoke what they really meant but that doesn’t happen often. We are too afraid of people might think of us or our words. People are basically insecure. The lot of us. Those that talk the most are perhaps more so. They don’t have time to think and are afraid of silence. A mine field, the art of conversation. The best thing is to not give a damn. 🙂 People don’t usually listen anyway.


  2. You’ve really made me think about how I joke about with my son who has Aspergers – I’m going to rethink what I do now based on how you’ve explained how it makes you feel. My sons too young to be able to tell me but your post has helped give me more insight – thank you


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