Today’s going to be a weird day. My schedule is thrown off. My routine, derailed. The hot water! It’s out, for goodness sake! Maintenance is fixing some burst pipes or some such nonsense. I’m still trying to figure out what that has to do with our apartment, but whatever … I have an excuse not to shower!
I CAN’T shower! Well, the water would be freezing, and the temp outside is rather chilly. How would I warm myself up? I would get really cold! I could get hypothermia! And, that could be deadly, so sorry, I’m not sorry.
I have an excuse not to shower, so when you smell me, don’t complain to me! Call the manager! Complain to him! Tell him that you cannot possibly stand the smell any longer. Tell him he must hurry! He MUST fix those busted pipes NOW! You tell him! I’m completely fine sitting in my stench, thank you.