Day Six.

Oy. Today, my resolve and willpower is being tested. One word, cravings. I want so many bad things: milk chocolate, donuts, meat … BACON. It just smells so good (and it doesn’t help that I am the only vegan in the household).

I can imagine the taste, the texture. My mouth waters in anticipation. This. Is. Serious.

Questions roll around my head, like clothes in a dryer. “What if” scenarios. What if I slip up and eat some milk chocolate? What if I eat some meat or a donut? What will happen? What will I do?

Although I ask myself “what if” questions, I already know the answer. I know the answer because I have been down this road too many times. I know myself all too well. I will get anxious and guilty. I will feel even more guilty and beat myself up, like usual. Then, I will feel even more guilty for beating myself up, for which I will beat myself up. And, as per usual, I will slip into a depression, triggered by my guilt and anxiety.

Now, Dr. Barnard, in today’s reading, states, “If you have goofed up, don’t dwell on it-and definitely don’t use it as a reason to abandon your healthy plans. Just dust yourself off and jump back on the wagon.” Ahhhhh … a sigh of relief.

You might be chuckling in your head (or aloud). And, quite honestly, it is a humorous situation in which I often find myself. I worry even before I should worry. I worry about my worrying. About this situation though, it is comforting to know that should an “accident” happen, should I slip up, I can still climb aboard the “wagon” and continue as if nothing has happened. I can still call myself a success, and that makes all the difference. Thank you, Dr. Barnard. Thank you.

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